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Controlling your emotions in the process of a divorce

Undoubtedly, the Missouri divorce process can be emotionally brutal to any Missourian's psyche. The once bright promise of a happy future with your partner has come to an end. During this time, Missourians are overwhelmed by negative feelings, including a belief in the loss of control. But, all hope is not lost. Although the decisions to be made in the process of a divorce often need to be mutual decisions, or if that is not possible, decisions made by lawyers, mediators or judges, you still have a say.

Depending on the situation, decisions need to be made regarding possible spousal support or alimony, and if children from the marriage are involved, child support and child custody. This is in addition to property division, which can become a very heated and contested battle, if both parties are not in agreement on how the property and monies from the marriage are to be divided. This can be made easier, if a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement had be formed, but if you are already in the process of a divorce, it is too late for that.

Instead, you must move forward and get the issues resolved, so you can move on with your life. Property is generally defined as marital or non-marital property, and the courts' decisions will largely be based on that determination. For items that need to be divided between you and your ex-spouse, it is important to assign a level of priority to each of the items.

Some sentimental items are more valuable to you than your ex-spouse, and vice versa for other items. Do not let the other side take advantage of you and what you find most valuable. Manipulations may occur if you let emotions get to you. Keeping your emotions in check is important to make the best decisions for yourself, not decisions made in haste.

A complex divorce may make the decision-making process more difficult. But, if you keep your emotions in check, you will be able to make wise and sound decisions to best serve your interests.

Source: HuffingtonPost.com, "Emotional Bermuda Triangle - the Things You Lose in a Divorce," Michela Montgomery, Oct. 23, 2015

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Joseph J. Porzenski
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